Thursday, December 31, 2009

Happy New Year! the journey begins...

Happy New Year to the 2 or 3 that read my blog!!
I've been thinking and I need to make it more about me, not just my IF journey. We'll do for the next year.
My daughter and I leave tomorrow to Spain. We get there on the 2nd and I have my 1st appointment on the 4th. I'm really nervous, but excited at the same time. I can't wait to get all this started finally. I hate hate hate that my husband is going to miss all the doctor's appointments and shots and pain and meltdowns...I wish he could be there with me. All in all, I'm in a great situation. It's Free, my mom is there jobless, and gordi is going to be in preschool every morning.
I'll post as soon as I talk to the doctor.
Oh! and our trip to UT was great, besides the ear infection that gordi has and the colds we all came back with. We went skiing, swimming in a crater, sleding...and we went to watch AVATAR, which was amazing.
See ya soon!!

Monday, December 21, 2009


I'm trying to leave a clean and organized house before I go to Spain. Not so much for my husband, but for my own I don't find it even worse when I get back...As I was organizing the files, I found a manila envelope stamped from our fertility clinic #1 (back in 2006). There, I found their data from the summer 2006. 2 SA's and my info and a genetic test (negative for cystic fybrosis) they did for me.
so I made a chart:
Date---------------- Sperm/ml ---Morphology---- Motility
6/09/2006 ---------2.4 mill --------9% --------------12%
6/30/06 ------------1.2 mill--------- 4%-------------- 9%
3/2009-------------- 0.2 mill---------- 0% -------------0%
10/2009 --------------0.3 mill ----------3% -----------4%

Any thoughts??........WOW...........

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

So many things going on..

Well...I guess it's normal that around Christmas all of us OCD's get stressed out, right?
1. Trip to Utah for a week - in one week
2. Trip to Spain for 2+ months - in 17 days

I just spotted. I'm at CD21. It happened last time. I spotted on day 21 and found out I was pregnant on day 28. 6 weeks after that I had a D&C.
I was so looking forward to a month with no tracking, no sticks, no programmed sex...and now this. I'm going to have dreams/nightmares about babies all week now. And then, I'm going to be depressed when I leave to Utah.

On the IVF front, I spoke to my dad a few days ago. He met with his cousin (who runs the IVF program at the University) and he said that Baby#1 (gordi, now 2.5) is a complete miracle. He says that I have something else that's not PCOS that makes it impossible for me to get pregnant. My dad couldn't remember the illness, or desease or whatever this really BAD thing that I have is called. HE COULDN'T REMEMBER!!! BUT, the Dr. is ready to meet with me on Jan.4th (2 days after I get there) to talk biz and get the cycle started. I'm excited about that.

Lately I have been thinking about my own personal "miracle" and how I just love her to death. I would do anything for her, and how lucky I am to be able to stay at home and spoil her rotten with my kisses and laughs. She loves me. She's healthy and we are a happy family. Even if we couldn't have more babies, we have our miracle and we're both enjoying every second of her. I'm mad that I got so stressed out when she was a baby and didn't stop crying for 8 months (she had "colic", and acid reflux). I'm mad that I left her at the bebysitter's for 9 months so I could go back to teaching part time. But now it's all good. She's fluent in Spanish, and understands all English. She just started speaking English again. And She loves me as much as I love her. We are so happy together. I'm so blessed. I can't be mad at God anymore, because he gave me my miracle.

I hope all you bloggers out there can get a miracle like mine.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

quick one

We have all the results back and it's all GOOD.
Genetic tests = normal (AND our insurance covered it(!) even though they said they didn't..)
SA = better than last time in March. Which means that his little ones are not dissapearing like my RE said they might be, therefore there's not going to be any poking at anybody's parts to get spermis out. Thank god. That sounded really awful when my RE in Spain said that they might have to do that.
I really hope that this means we can get pregnant with 2 cycles of IVF. Hopefully in one, and hopefully with twins. I know the controversy, but I don't care. I want to do this once and be done with it. And I want 3 kids.
Woo Hoo!
Less than a month to go. Can't wait.
Oh! and I just made a new friend, and it just so happens that she works for a plastic surgeon and she's going to help me get my face I don't look like a little teenager going through No botox or injections or anything like that...all lotions and potions.