bad news and goodbye

None survived the thaw, and since nobody is following, I´m saying goodbye. Good luck to you all!

So nervous...

I am freaking out people...I called my friend the embryologist and he said that Dr. Moron never told him that I was doing my FET tomorrow. OK. Well, I´m telling you NOW. Yes, he had seen my name on the weekly to-do list and knew it already....also, said that he was going to check with the girls at the lab and let me know. Well...here I am, still waiting next to the phone and it is midnight. I´m guessing he´s not calling tonight.

I am also guessing they will call tomorrow with bad news..I really don´t know how a FET works and all the thawing process (I´ll prob go check Dr. Goo.gle in a sec), but he probably knows whether there has been any progress or not with my embies. right?? They got them out of the tank today...then again, this is Spain...maybe nobody was working there this afternoon. Anyways, I can´t wait to know the status of my babies. I feel like they are babies already. I might loose 3 more!! I´ve already lost 3...

I´ll let you (or nobody, cause nobody is following) know tomorrow...

FET in 1 day!

I have been enjoying myself this time around. I haven´t obsessed over anything related to the transfer. Finally. I feel my body very relaxed lately. Maybe it has to do with the fiestas here and all the partying I'm doing...It's been fun.
Transfer is on tuesday. I'm going to stay home this time around. Gordi will stay at school for a bit longer than usual, my bro will take her to my dad's for lunch and will bring her back for siesta. I'll just lay on the couch all day. In the afternoon my mom will take her to the playground next to us.
The fact that I don't have to be monitored at all has helped tremendously. I hate that place, and I'm glad I don't have to be there at all.
Wish me luck!!

PS: I am a little concerned about the fact that I'm not getting any comments to my posts...I started the blog in order to deal with my emotions, not to get reactions...but it was nice to look forward to a comment or two...

update

I made it to Spain on sunday. Good flight.
Visit with Dr went great. Both my ovaries have stopped their normal activities, and my lining is 8mm. So, the transfer of my frozen embies is next tuesday, the 14th, that is, if they survive the thaw. I have to start pro.gesterone on thursday 3xday orally and 3xday vaginally on the 14th. I have to keep the es.trogen 3xday until after my 3rd month of pregnancy, if everything goes well.
I feel better now. Not so sick. Sometimes I just want to puke, and I´m exhausted. Jet lag is kicking my butt, and Gordi´s too.
Gordi started at the preschool here on monday so I could go to the Dr. She loves it.
We are actually having fun, the town´s fiestas started this weekend, so everybody is out and there´s lots to do. I´m going to a bullfight tomorrow. My mom organized it for me. I used to like it because it was more of a prestigious thing to do, but now I hate it...I just feel bad that she spent the money for me...I don´t know how I´m going to make it through the whole 2 hrs...
I am happy that my daughter gets to enjoy the fiesta like I did when I was her age...I told my mom today that if this FET doesn´t give me a baby, I´m going to go back to work next year, and I´m going to spend all my extra money in trips to Spain and taking care of us. I want my daughter to grow up like I did, with fiestas and family all around.
I have 0 hope for this FET. I´m afraid that Dr.Moron was right and all my embies sucked.
DH and I have been talking, and "we" are done after this time. For a few years at least. I don´t want any more drugs, any more waiting, any more feeling sick, and nuts, and putting everything else on hold for a baby that doesn´t come. I´m selling all of our baby stuff and moving on with our lives.
I´ll probably start pushing for another IVF in a couple of years or so, when we can afford it in the US, locally. DH is done. He´s scared of all the drugs and cancer...and done with my crazy emotions.
So, I will be liberated in a about 2 and a half weeks. Wish me luck!